Rediscovering Yourself: Embarking on a Journey of Self-Discovery
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I’ve been pretty quiet for a bit now as I’ve been working through one of the biggest personal challenges I’ve faced in a long time.
My long-term boyfriend and I decided it was time to end our relationship.
A few months back, I started working with a coach to help me understand and clear limiting beliefs that I know have been holding me back in many areas of my life, and immediately after starting my work with her I heard my intuition very clearly telling me that it was time to move on from this relationship.
I loved him, but it was time to let him go so I could focus on my growth.
I had been asking my intuition for guidance on what the next step was for me, and while I want to say this was the unexpected answer I received, I had known deep down for some time that this was coming.
But that didn’t make it any easier.
The first month was the hardest, filled with lots of tears and doubt and fear. Crying on the floor, in the car, in the shower. Wondering if I had just selfishly torn apart the life we had been building because I wanted more. Confused about why I couldn’t just be happy with what I had and scared about what it would mean to begin again.
And terrified that I didn’t even know what the next step after this would be.
But I kept coming back to my intuition and asking if I was doing the right thing, and the answer was always yes. The work I had been doing with my coach helped me feel confident in this inner guidance, and so I decided to trust it fully.
I started to reflect on what the lessons might be that I was meant to learn, and quickly realized that I had grown so comfortable in my relationship that I had stopped growing as a person. I stopped seeking out new experiences. I got lost in my day to day with no real plan for what I wanted in life. I stopped pushing myself to be uncomfortable.
I stayed in my comfort zone and refused to step outside for anything.
And that didn’t align with this life that I’m building. One where I consistently challenge myself to learn and grow, finding new things to experience and places to see and people to help. I wasn’t going to be able to do any of that if I stayed stuck in the same place for the rest of my life.
But this meant for the first time in a long time, I was going to be alone. And to be completely honest that scared me quite a bit.
I realized I didn’t know who I was or what I really liked or even where I wanted to go in life. I felt like had completely lost myself.
So I set out on a mission to learn about myself, and learn to love to be with me. To learn what are the things that I love and what makes me happy. To get clear on what it is I truly desire. To start my journey of growth again, and to find myself along the way.
I still have quite a bit to learn, but I wanted to share a few of the things that have helped me start to find my way in hopes that they’ll help you too:
Create space to hear your inner guidance. Each morning, I spend time meditating and journaling (even just for 10 minutes) to give myself space to hear anything that I need to and get in touch with myself. Don’t worry if your mind is busy or you have no idea what to write, sometimes once you start you’ll be surprised what happens. Getting in the habit of creating this space has been one of the most valuable practices I’ve implemented.
Don’t ignore the nagging feeling that something isn’t right. Your intuition is always trying to guide you on your best path, and while sometimes it’s hard to hear it always knows what is right. If you feel like you need to do something differently or change something in your life, sit with that feeling for a bit rather than brushing it aside.
Try new things. At some point in our lives, we decide we no longer have time for fun and must just dedicate our days to working and checking things off our to do lists. Think about what you used to love to do and try picking it up again, or just start completely fresh! Whether it be creating art, playing intramural sports, or cooking a new recipe, you’ll start to expand your mind and discover new things about yourself once you start giving yourself permission to have some fun.
Practice self-love. This is one I’ve always struggled with but have been dedicating more time to caring for myself and practicing giving myself the love that I’m so used to giving to everyone around me. Some days this is enjoying my evening self-care routine complete with an Epsom salt bath and gua sha, while other days it is going for a long walk in the park with my puppy. I’ll also often find a self-love affirmation that resonates with me that day or week, and set it as a reminder in my phone or keep a self-love affirmation card by my bedside table.
This journey of self-discovery can be scary, but is also one of the best things you’ll ever do for yourself. I’m so excited to hear all of the wonderful things you discover about yourself and see where you go from here.
